A Fartshumper Summer
What summer in Minneapolis has looked like…
Having lived half my life on the North Coast here in Minnesota, I’ve come to appreciate the Scandinavian heritage that permeates the culture. These are stoic straightforward upright no nonsense sorts that recognize we all benefit from working together to create a better community.
Since they originate from Viking stock in bitterly cold climates where daylight is scarce for a portion of the year, summer is a season to celebrate. Gardens bloom under great thought and tending. The wealth of lakes are filled with kayakers and swimmers. And all levels of government go to work on projects to repair and replace aging infrastructure so we don’t have to suffer the embarrassment - and pain - of another bridge collapse in the future.
This summer has been remarkably extraordinary with the range of projects affecting The Cities. When residents began complaining about the number of projects, there were protestations from various city, county, and state departments saying the number of projects was the same as always…until one started adding all those projects together to realize that perhaps each of those projects had multiple parts, and oops! It may be truly impossible to get from the West side of The Cities to the East side of The Cities on a vast number of previously passable roads.
And that’s where the fartshumpers come in.
By the beginning of May, our otherwise lovely neighborhood began sprouting pipes that crisscrossed streets and sidewalks to provide water to households while aged pipes were being lined - oh, and while they were at it, fiber optic cable was strung. When PVC pipes go across a street, they are covered with a mound of gravely dirt so cars don’t break them, which makes sense. Until you drive over the first one believing it to be a normal “bump” and your car gives a “wha-hoo-ha rump” sound it’s hard to forget.
The word for speed bump in Norwegian is Fartshumper - and that’s exactly what this summer has been. Filled with fartshumper speed bumps that make driving perilous and slow. Never before in our experience has the knowledge that summer will come to an end been so curiously welcome up here.
What the physical fartshumpers have provided us residents of Linden Hills are a series of lessons to manage the psychological fartshumpers we’re experiencing in the country.
I’ve learned that cutting down exposure to the incessant string of fartshumpers in the news is soothing. I’ve learned that taking it slow and carefully can reduce the impact of the shocks resulting from the tariff, no tariff, tariff again game show.
And I’ve learned to pivot in my meal preparations. Egg prices have settled down now that bird flu has abated - thank you, science and research. But the impact of climate change and a shortage of immigrants to harvest crops is having an impact on other commodities. Coffee prices? Yikes! We’re cutting back on meat and learning great recipes for beans for protein. And chocolate is a luxury. Even Costco discontinued its chocolate chips with rising costs - so ginger cookies it is!
At least the word is fun to say and can elicit a smile amidst the insanity of the fartshumpers coming our way for the foreseeable future…stay sane, friends.